Backup singer: Delusional Clemson Tiger Faaaaaan!
Announcer: Season after season, year after year, you rank your team among the nation’s elite, only to find that pollsters don’t even rank you as one of the best teams in the ACC.
Backup singer: Why aren’t we number ooooone?
Announcer: You scramble to make futile attempts at damage control when,with your quiver-lipping coach at the controls, you lose to Duke or Wake Forest.
Backup singer: Cry like a babyyyyyyy!
Announcer: Inevitably, you’ll bring up the past, and boast of the mythical national championship you bought with illegal recruits over 25 years ago.
Backup singer: Those were the daaaaaays!
Announcer: You’ll perpetually ignore that your stadium’s nickname is a blantant ripoff of LSU’s Death Valley.
Backup singer: We not only cheat, but we steal toooooooo!
Announcer: Go on, ignore that home bitch-slapping to your archrival in last year’s regular season finale and believe that you’ll defeat FSU with striking ease, only to lose yet another important season matchup.
Backup singer: Peach be damned - we belong in the BCSSSSSSS!
Announcer: So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, oh Emperor of Excuses, and know that when you don’t finish in the top 25, you most likely won’t be there at the start of next season, either.
Backup singer: Mr. Delusional Clemson Tiger Fannnnnnn!
Anheiser-Busch, St Louis, Missouri