#1 If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received! in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
#2 In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."
#3 It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the "honeymoon. "
#4 Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Friday, June 23, 2006
Friday Funny
I saw this on a e-mail forward today and deemed it worthy for a post. So here goes:
You might be from South Carolina if...
You know you're from South Carolina if....
1. You can properly pronounce Tugaloo, Tamassee, Jocassee
2. You think people who complain about the heat in their states are sissies.
3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
5. Stores don't have bags or shopping carts, they have sacks and buggies.
6. You've seen people wear bib overalls at weddings and funerals.
7. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
8. You measure distance in minutes.
9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
11. You know cowpies are not made of beef.
12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
13. You know someone who has a belt buckle bigger than your fist.
14. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, beer, and bait all in the same store.
15. A Mercedes Benz isn't a status symbol. A Chevy Silverado Extended Bed Crew Cab is.
16. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressing.
17. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.
18. You actually get these jokes and are "fixin'" to send them to your friends.
19. You wanna go back to South Carolina, where everything is normal
And finally:
20. You are 100% from South Carolina if you have ever had this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr Pepper"
You might be from South Carolina if...
You know you're from South Carolina if....
1. You can properly pronounce Tugaloo, Tamassee, Jocassee
2. You think people who complain about the heat in their states are sissies.
3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
5. Stores don't have bags or shopping carts, they have sacks and buggies.
6. You've seen people wear bib overalls at weddings and funerals.
7. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
8. You measure distance in minutes.
9. You go to the lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
10. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
11. You know cowpies are not made of beef.
12. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
13. You know someone who has a belt buckle bigger than your fist.
14. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, beer, and bait all in the same store.
15. A Mercedes Benz isn't a status symbol. A Chevy Silverado Extended Bed Crew Cab is.
16. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressing.
17. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.
18. You actually get these jokes and are "fixin'" to send them to your friends.
19. You wanna go back to South Carolina, where everything is normal
And finally:
20. You are 100% from South Carolina if you have ever had this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr Pepper"
Thursday, June 22, 2006
A little humor this Thursday...
Hurricane Names......Well, it appears our African American friends have found something else to be pissed about. A black congresswoman (this would be Sheila Jackson Lee, of Houston) reportedly complained that the names of hurricanes are all Caucasian-sounding names. She would prefer some names that reflect African-American culture such as "Chamiqua, Woeisha, and Jamal. "
I can hear it now: A weatherman in Houston saying... "Wordup, Muthas! Herr-i-cane Chamiqua be headin' fo'Galveston like Leroy on a crotch rocket! Bitch be a category fo'! So,turn off dem chitlins, grab yo' chirren, leave yo crib, and head fo' de nearest FEMA office fo yo FREE shit!"
***Editor's Note---Please note the writers of LOHD are not racist, just find humor in life and sometimes the "race card" issue can cause comedy.
I can hear it now: A weatherman in Houston saying... "Wordup, Muthas! Herr-i-cane Chamiqua be headin' fo'Galveston like Leroy on a crotch rocket! Bitch be a category fo'! So,turn off dem chitlins, grab yo' chirren, leave yo crib, and head fo' de nearest FEMA office fo yo FREE shit!"
***Editor's Note---Please note the writers of LOHD are not racist, just find humor in life and sometimes the "race card" issue can cause comedy.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
This has to be the worst news story....
I could not believe this story when I read it.....Sick and twisted! This man should be shot for this....I hate to hear of people being harmful to pets and this is just bad.....at least the dog is going to be okay......
Indiantown man accused of sex with puppy
A mixed-breed dog was being placed in foster care Tuesday after being rescued from a transient Indiantown man who was allegedly having sex with the puppy.
A witness called a Martin County deputy who arrived to find Junio Trenta, 31, having anal intercourse with the dog amid the woods in the 3200 block of Southeast Dixie Highway about 12:11 p.m. Monday. Upon being seen, Trenta said, "It's my dog," and, "What's the problem?" The male dog ran and hid behind the deputies, according to a report released Tuesday.
Trenta, a Mexican citizen working as a laborer, was charged with one count of felony sexual bestiality and one count of felony animal cruelty. He was also charged with one misdemeanor count each of giving a false name to deputies, exposure of sexual organs and possession of paraphernalia after a marijuana-smoking pipe was found in his pocket, according to the report.
He was being held on a $13,000 bail Tuesday at the Martin County jail.
Records from the Florida Department of Law Enforcement show Trenta spent 28 days in jail after pleading no contest to an Orange County misdemeanor larceny charge in 2005.
The dog, a 4-month-old Argentine Dogo, was being cared for by the Humane Society of the Treasure Coast.
"He's already been evaluated by the vet, and the vet says he's OK and will recover from whatever happened," Humane Society spokeswoman Roberta Synal said Tuesday. "If he's put in a good foster home, he's going to get lots of love and training."
Link to actual article here
Indiantown man accused of sex with puppy
A mixed-breed dog was being placed in foster care Tuesday after being rescued from a transient Indiantown man who was allegedly having sex with the puppy.
A witness called a Martin County deputy who arrived to find Junio Trenta, 31, having anal intercourse with the dog amid the woods in the 3200 block of Southeast Dixie Highway about 12:11 p.m. Monday. Upon being seen, Trenta said, "It's my dog," and, "What's the problem?" The male dog ran and hid behind the deputies, according to a report released Tuesday.
Trenta, a Mexican citizen working as a laborer, was charged with one count of felony sexual bestiality and one count of felony animal cruelty. He was also charged with one misdemeanor count each of giving a false name to deputies, exposure of sexual organs and possession of paraphernalia after a marijuana-smoking pipe was found in his pocket, according to the report.
He was being held on a $13,000 bail Tuesday at the Martin County jail.
Records from the Florida Department of Law Enforcement show Trenta spent 28 days in jail after pleading no contest to an Orange County misdemeanor larceny charge in 2005.
The dog, a 4-month-old Argentine Dogo, was being cared for by the Humane Society of the Treasure Coast.
"He's already been evaluated by the vet, and the vet says he's OK and will recover from whatever happened," Humane Society spokeswoman Roberta Synal said Tuesday. "If he's put in a good foster home, he's going to get lots of love and training."
Link to actual article here
The day of all days
Today is National Pee on Earth Day, a day to conserve toilet water. Origianlly a holiday in Sweden but now is celebrated world wide. Also in happy news Clemson lost last night to CSF titans. It was a valyent effort by the cats but as we all knew, they would choke in the end. Also in Clemson and South Carolina, the sporting news has prediticed that Carolina and Clemson will be two of the biggest disapointments of the 2006 football season.
Two great quotes from the College World Series
"If I owned Texas and hell, I would rent Texas and live in hell"
and "Taxes, Death, and Clemson coking in the college world series"
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Norway beats us to it....
Talk about advance planning.....
Norway to House Seeds in Doomsday Vault
"Norway's ambitious project is on its way to becoming reality Monday when construction begins on the Svalbard Global Seed Vault, designed to house as many as 3 million of the world's crop seeds.
Prime ministers of Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Finland and Iceland were to attend the cornerstone ceremony on Monday morning near the town of Longyearbyen in Norway's remote Svalbard Islands, roughly 620 miles from the North Pole.
Norway's Agriculture Minister Terje Riis-Johansen has called the vault a "Noah's Ark on Svalbard."
Its purpose is to ensure the survival of crop diversity in the event of plant epidemics, nuclear war, natural disasters or climate change, and to offer the world a chance to restart growth of food crops that may have been wiped out.
The seeds, packaged in foil, would be stored at such cold temperatures that they could last hundreds, even thousands, of years, according to the independent Global Crop Diversity Trust. The trust, founded in 2004, has also worked on the project and will help run the vault, which is scheduled to open and start accepting seeds from around the world in September 2007. Oil-rich Norway first proposed the idea a year ago, drawing wide international interest, Riis-Johansen said. The Svalbard Archipelago, 300 miles north of the mainland, was selected because it is located far from many threats and has a consistently cold climate.
Those factors will help protect the seeds and safeguard their genetic makeup, Norway's Foreign Ministry said. The vault will have thick concrete walls, and even if all cooling systems fail, the temperature in the frozen mountain will never rise above freezing due to permafrost, it said. While the facility will be fenced in and guarded, Svalbard's free-roaming polar bears, known for their ferocity, could also act as natural guardians, according to the Global Diversity Trust. The Nordic nation is footing the bill, amounting to about $4.8 million for infrastructure costs."
Norway to House Seeds in Doomsday Vault
"Norway's ambitious project is on its way to becoming reality Monday when construction begins on the Svalbard Global Seed Vault, designed to house as many as 3 million of the world's crop seeds.
Prime ministers of Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Finland and Iceland were to attend the cornerstone ceremony on Monday morning near the town of Longyearbyen in Norway's remote Svalbard Islands, roughly 620 miles from the North Pole.
Norway's Agriculture Minister Terje Riis-Johansen has called the vault a "Noah's Ark on Svalbard."
Its purpose is to ensure the survival of crop diversity in the event of plant epidemics, nuclear war, natural disasters or climate change, and to offer the world a chance to restart growth of food crops that may have been wiped out.
The seeds, packaged in foil, would be stored at such cold temperatures that they could last hundreds, even thousands, of years, according to the independent Global Crop Diversity Trust. The trust, founded in 2004, has also worked on the project and will help run the vault, which is scheduled to open and start accepting seeds from around the world in September 2007. Oil-rich Norway first proposed the idea a year ago, drawing wide international interest, Riis-Johansen said. The Svalbard Archipelago, 300 miles north of the mainland, was selected because it is located far from many threats and has a consistently cold climate.
Those factors will help protect the seeds and safeguard their genetic makeup, Norway's Foreign Ministry said. The vault will have thick concrete walls, and even if all cooling systems fail, the temperature in the frozen mountain will never rise above freezing due to permafrost, it said. While the facility will be fenced in and guarded, Svalbard's free-roaming polar bears, known for their ferocity, could also act as natural guardians, according to the Global Diversity Trust. The Nordic nation is footing the bill, amounting to about $4.8 million for infrastructure costs."
To read the entire article, click here.
Monday, June 19, 2006
Monday: Joke of the Day...
Man goes into a cocktail lounge and approaches Maxine sitting by herself...
Man: "May I buy you a cocktail?"
Maxine: "No thank you, alcohol is bad for my legs."
Man: Confused but says "Sorry to hear that. Do they swell?"
Maxine: "No, they open."
Man: "May I buy you a cocktail?"
Maxine: "No thank you, alcohol is bad for my legs."
Man: Confused but says "Sorry to hear that. Do they swell?"
Maxine: "No, they open."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
